Tag Archives: bipolar

Uh … Where Did the Month Go?

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Variety is the Spice of Life

If “failure is the condiment that gives success its flavor” (Truman Capote), how spicy do you like your success stories?

The Spice of Success

I hate when someone gets things too easily, but I also hate when someone has to struggle continuously to get where they need to go or get what they need to get.

Considering today is Election Day, I like a candidate that has a bit of an uphill battle. One who doesn’t get all the money from corporations. I want a candidate that didn’t live the rich life. I want one who will actually understand what the middle class and lower have dealt with. I don’t have a problem with finding out someone I might vote for had to be on food stamps at one point, or had to get student loans. When I hear that Mommy and Daddy paid for everything, I get turned off. They don’t know the struggle that it is to live in this world. They have always had someone or something to fall back on. That’s what I look for in a candidate. That’s the success stories I enjoy.

When it comes to the books that I read, I like a little failure. Guy gets girl on the first try? Can we say so super boring. There is honestly nothing worse than that. I hate it. It’s so trite and over done. But when they have to struggle a little to find their happiness? That’s real life. That’s how it really happens. That’s the real world. That’s the kind of story I like to read.

My life has had it’s challenges. I’ve dealt with severe depression. I’ve dealt with the highs and lows of manic depression, also known as bi-polar, later re-diagnosed as PMDD (Premenstrual dysphoric disorder). That’s what I dealt with. I also dealt with insane relatives. Really bad home life (mostly of my own making), and I came out on the other side stronger, healthier, happier. That’s the best way to live my life, I think.

Failure might not be an option, but as Yoda says “Do or do not. There is no try.” You can fail but you did it. You didn’t just try. You failed. Then you learn from that failure, and you try again. That’s what makes life interesting. Having nothing but success makes life stupid boring, and no one, and I mean no one, wants that. Even if you claim you want to always be right, you’re completely lying to yourself.

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Sarah is an icky

Translation: Sarah feels like ass.

I was going through my re-current symptoms and it looks like what we’ve been thinking is PMDD might be something more because it lasts for longer than a week. The symptoms also match up with LOTS of other “illnesses”. One of the big ones that pop out are hypothyroidism, bipolar and much more o.O I’m seriously doubting the bipolar. I’ve been diagnosed with that, and I hate it!!

I’m just tired of being tired. I’m tired of aches and pains. I’m tired of everything, lately, it seems.

And, no, I’m depressed. I swear I’m not. Trust me, I know what it feels like to be depressed. The fact that I’m exhausted, but can still smile and play with my kids, migraine not-withstanding. That’s not depression. It’s like the exhaustion that comes with the flu, but ebbs and flows. That’s not depression, at least not what I’ve experienced. Plus increase in sex drive is so not a symptom of depression, XD

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Top 10

Top 10 Reasons I Love My Hubby:

01. He loves me in spite of my short-comings. Sometimes, I think he loves me because of them.
02. He’s an amazing and wonderful father. You can tell how much those kids love him, as soon as he pulls into the complex.
03. He treats me like a princess 75% of the time, even when I treat him like dirt (I don’t do it purposefully).
04. He does his best to understand my disorder (bipolar with mild agoraphobia … aka major panic attacks in the middle of Walmart)
05. He’s loved by my family. I love my family and trust their instincts, and the adore him.
06. If I feel like shit, he feels like shit, even if I don’t take it out on him, 🙂
07. He values and trusts my opinion. I’m an equal all the way, even if he makes the money.
08. I can push and push, and he’ll just push back, or grab hold. He won’t let me hurt myself through him.
09. He accepts my competitiveness, and man, can it get bad at points.
10. He’s absolutely perfect in every way. Yes, he drives me bonkers at least a third of the time, but he makes up for it in so many ways!!

We’ve hit the 5 hour mark, folks. 5 hours and counting!! Come on!! That’s just, what, 10 more posts? 9? Something like that. Don’t make me count!! My brain hurts!!

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