I need a vacation. Badly. Things just suck right now. So, I’m not not checking out Lufthansa flights, or anything like that, but I’m ready to just take off and go somewhere else.
I’m needing the vacation badly, though. I know I’ve mentioned it, but I felt it needed to be said again.
Yesterday, I got the news that my grandfather had passed away. It wasn’t that it was unexpected. He’d been dealing with cancer for several years, and we all knew the end was close. But it just feels like it happened faster than it should have, or something.
My grandfather wasn’t biologically my grandfather. He’s the father of my step-mom. I consider her my mom, though (in all ways but biological). He always accepted me for me, and encouraged me to be the very best that I could be. Because of him, I found my love of writing. This year’s NaNoWriMo will definitely be dedicated to him.
I’m not able to go to the funeral for him. The kids have school, and Josh has to work. I know myself, and high stress situations, and this is definitely going to be a high stress situation. My Mammaw is a little nuts, as is my aunt and my sister. The only sane one was my grandfather, and my mom. Without him, the whole dynamic has a risk of falling apart, and I don’t want to see that. I don’t want my kids to see it.
So, we’re going to send edible foods to them, or something like that. Thankfully, my parents understand, and my amazing grandfather would understand as well. He always said that school was the most important thing, and that you have to take care of your family. This is how I’ll be taking care of my family.
Pappaw/Big Jerry, I’m going to miss you. You were one of the cornerstones of my life, that kept me from going too far over the edge. You’re always going to be in my thoughts. I love you!