It is so hard to write when you have a headache. I mean, seriously, it is hard. You have the constant throbbing that just takes away any incentive you have to write. You just want to lay down and remove the world, and sleep it away. But nope, you cannot do that. It is NaNoWriMo time, and you have to write your one-thousand-six-hundred-sixty-seven words, or else. Or else nothing really happens, but you then wake up the next day, and you are behind by two times the amount you were before. So, it makes it impossibly impossible to catch up.
Okay, that is definitely an over-dramatization, but the simple thought is there: you have to write, even if you do not feel up to writing. We all have days like that. There are times when you just want to throw your hands up in the air and say “screw it, I am done. I am over it. I am fine with failing.” After you have won a few times, though, you go to yourself: Do I really want to just give up? I have proven that I can do it once. Why should I settle for anything less this time?
The answer is you do not. You power through it. Just the way you are supposed to. Even when your head feels like it is going to explode. Even when you cannot see straight because your vision is getting blurry. You power through it and you just continue writing.
Right now, I am struggling with a few scenes. I do not write “fight” scenes well at all. I did not read the books I got. That is probably my biggest issue. That, and I cannot seem to remember to describe everything. There are not a lot of descriptions in the story. Like, at all. Not much period. That is not really helping to boost up the word count. Then I have two characters who seem to have the hots for each other, but I cannot even write a decent kiss. I need to work on that as well. I would practice, and see, but my jaw is killing me from the air pressure change. Which, in turn, causes my head to hurt even more. That causes my neck to cringe. That leads to even more pain everywhere.
Have I mentioned that I hate fall? I really and truly do. Usually, it is one of my favorite seasons, but this year, we are not getting cooler weather. No, we are still almost in summer temperatures. We have hit nearly 80 several times since fall started. That is just nuts. We are not expecting a much colder winter, though we just desperately need a good deep freeze. Even if it only lasts for a couple days, we need it. I would honestly like to see some snow. I like snow. I do not like driving in it, but I love snow. I love to take pictures of it. I love to just sit and watch it fall, with a nice warm cup of hot chocolate. Maybe I will sip it from my NaNoWriMo mug. Who knows? I just know that I would kill, seriously kill, for something like that right now, right here, in Kansas.
Instead they are telling us that we are expected to get some severe storms. Yes, we need the rain. We need it desperately. Those on the East Coast have a lot of damage and things caused by Sandy and Athena, but the Midwest has been dealing with drought conditions for two years going on, and it only makes the news when it affects the bacon costs. No one mentions that farmers are having to feed hundreds of heads of cattle from TAP WATER because their ponds have dried up. The rest of the country only cares that the price of their food have gone up. They do not see the correlation between their obsession with gas guzzling vehicles and coal power plants and how the environment is screaming out for us to listen and pay attention. No, it is going to continue to get worse, until we are all dead. Then maybe, just maybe, the extreme right will actually listen for once.
I doubt that will happen though. I so did not mean to just rant and rant, but apparently that is what I have done, for nearly seven hundred and fifty words. Well, at least I am getting some words down, and sitting here, focusing on this is actually helping my head. Which is sort of weird. Really weird.