I cheated.
I lied.
I failed myself.
I failed my friends.
No, it wasn’t on my husband. It was on NaNoWriMo. I cheated. Big time.
I got called on it. I fixed it. But, I think I hurt some friendships with that. There is nothing I can do to fix those, but to apologize and fix what I’ve done wrong.
This is my major apology. I’m on my knees, begging forgiveness. I hate myself for what I did. Kori and Kristi, I’m very much glad that you two live in California and nowhere near Kansas. You two started NaNo because of me, and god, look how I fucked up. I am so sorry. Thank you BOTH for calling me out on it. There are no excuses for it.
I can only hope that I didn’t fuck things up so badly that you two never want to talk to me again. Thankfully, it seems Kori has semi-forgiven me enough to talk to me. I am so glad to count her as a friend. Her calling me out on this issue is the best thing that could have happened.
Oh, and how did I cheat?
“Your self”
“My self”
“Can not”
Etc.
All fixed. No more. No more cheating. I am done.
Now to write more. I lost nearly 1K in words fixing those errors.
#1 by kori on November 23, 2009 - 10:47 am
i read this, i cried.
i love you!
#2 by Sarah on November 23, 2009 - 10:50 am
I had to keep myself from crying as I wrote it, and as I’m texting you, and replying on Twitter. I hate that I did it, but I at least owned up to it.
*hugs*
#3 by kori on November 23, 2009 - 10:51 am
damnit, i didnt click the box to notify me of followup comments..
lol “followup” ONE word, sarah!!! dont make it two!
lol, imma dick.
#4 by Sarah on November 23, 2009 - 10:56 am
Actually, I think it’s follow-up, :lol:. Still only one word,
I hate hyphened words. They annoy me, 
OOOOHHHHH!! HERE WE GO AGAIN!!
*:lol:*
#5 by Krissy on November 23, 2009 - 11:47 am
I’m glad you did this. I didn’t really like it, but I felt the only one you were cheating was you, especially once you got up there with your numbers. *hugz* It’s hard to admit you’re wrong and I’m proud of you for doing it.
Krissy´s last blog ..Update #1 – The (Not-So) New Job
#6 by Sarah on November 23, 2009 - 11:53 am
Thanks! I’m glad I got called on it.
*hugs*
And I was cheating more than myself. I was cheating those that were cheering me on, and cheering for hitting high word counts. They didn’t deserve that (you included).